Thursday, May 8, 2008

New York's homeless aren't the only parasites in the subway

Bloodsucking bedbugs have been observed in several subway stations. Those who promote public transportation as a green alternative to driving everywhere in a Hummer should be reminded that public transportation involves exposure not only to the public and their unpleasant odors and appearances, but also to the various ambient wildlife that dwells in their hair and clothes.

When informed by the NY Post reporter that bedbugs had been sighted on subway-station benches, one rider seated on a bench leapt to her feet shrieking. The real question is, why would she sit on that in the first place, when everyone except tourists knows that theose benches are soaked in urine? Dogs walk by them, and dogs have a natural compulsion to pee on everything. Bums sleep on them, and bums are notoriously incontinent, due to the they are frequently mentally-ill and passed out drunk. So sitting on a bench in a subway station is like using a urinal as a drinking fountain.

That's almost as dumb as putting the receiver of a pay telephone near your face.

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